sworn to war

so I have been rebeating the mass effect series to take a look at myself.  One thing I got out of this was I think no matter what I am doing I am always going to be a combatant.  I think no matter if it is going to look like ranger, warrior, warlord, or assassin I am there to fight.  I think I like balanced combatants over anything else though.

black manna root

So for those of you that know me I had a period of black manna in my life that was changed by an elf phase.  But now with the way life is progressing I think the black was just buried not removed.  Now over the years through erosion I think that the black manna has been seeping through the cracks and I am a lot more ruthless and have a lot less tolerance for the shortcomings of humanity.  I am trying to make changes in my life but if things don't change I believe that the black will resurface.  The important question is will a change just rebury the black manna or will it be powerful enough to remove the black manna from its root.

The Wolverine

Ok so just saw the new x-men movie the wolverine and it almost single handily made up for the past movies they put out.  If you were thinking you might pass this movie due to x-men's past, don't.  I'm not going to talk that much about it don't want to give anything away, though the cliff hanger after the credits is awesome cannot wait for the next movie.

Honor

So for those of you that do not know I hit a wall a couple days ago, but things have once again improved.  On the philosophical front I have come back to a key component to my philosophy and that is honor.  So for now on I have to remember to keep things honorable.  I came to this conclusion when we were playing SC2 as random and I kept getting Protoss. This reminded me why I always liked them in the first place, a culture built around honor.  So for now on I need to remain focused and always keep honor in mind, and with this I shall force honor on the world.

Mass Effect

So I have beaten all of Mass Effect. The franchise as a whole was very well done.  I thought ME 1 was the best out of all three followed by ME 3 then ME 2.  I think when you look at it ME 1 had a decent system, sure it needed some work, which by ME 3 it seems that they got it to where they wanted it.  Unlike ME 2 where they completely overhauled the system in which they, pretty much got rid of class customization, and the game overall seemed forced upon you instead of you on it, the you just go around and harvesting every planet and end up getting every upgrade.  ME 3 was then cleaned up to get a good level of class customization and brought back equipment, which also gave you more customization.  The biggest downfall of ME 3 in my opinion was the lack of squad members.  I mean come on you did not get a single Krogan, the best race in the game.  After gameplay it comes down to storyline.  I think that the ME 1 story line just stood out more than the others not that ME 3's story line was bad just that I like ME 1 a little better, and like I said before ME 2 just felt like it was forced upon you.

Something New

So after a long time of contemplation I have played and beaten Mass Effect one over the last few days.  For the longest time I did not want to play it because I was not much of a fan of science fiction.  I don't know when and where we had a falling out but there has been a rekindling.  What really got me to try it was that because I could justify playing Metroid why could I not give Mass Effect a try.  It was only twenty dollars and I could not think of a reason not to do it.  If I did not like it I could just stop so why not.  In the end I really liked Mass Effect one and am now have moved on to Mass Effect two.  We will see what happens.  The main point though is it feels good to be doing something new.  It is always good to have something new to manifest my will in, and to get a better understanding and further development of self.  This also has put me in a philosophical upturn, which has been low for far too long.  Now I just need to figure out what to do about reality.

The ill efects of the past

I look at myself and I wonder did I ever truly leave evil behind.  Sure I have changed from what I was one things first started but how much has truly changed.  Could it be that I am just a more wise evil than I once was.  On a separate note I wonder how much of my life was determined because I was able to play the evil side of the game.  To put this in a better perspective if you look at LOTR you are only able to play on the side of good.  On the other hand you look at WOW and you are able to play on the more brutal side.  That is where I fell, with the trolls trying to get gods to come down so that they could eat them.  I find myself wondering where I would have ended up if I would have been on the more heroic side of things instead of the more evil and brutal side.  Which brings me back to my original point have I really left evil behind.  And to that I don't think that I have.  I think that no matter what I try to mask the evil with it will always be there deep down at the root of my soul.